Dear Patrick...

Dear Patrick,
Tonight has been an unexpectedly emotional night for me. I have been thinking all week about Friday, Friday, Friday, because this week, Friday is March 11th--the incredible day you were born. But tonight (Thursday, March 10th) around 8:00, it hit me--one year ago tonight is when your journey out of the womb really began. I want to tell you your birth story. I think I saved a place on this blog to write this story about a year ago, but I don't think I ever got back to it. Your life has been enriched in so many ways by being our second child, but in the way of documentation, your brother Will got more. But, you got the privilege of having an older brother who adores you (sometimes it might not seem like it, but he does!) and parents who didn't have to learn about babies by taking care of you. Will was our guinea pig. You got the seasoned veterans. :-) But I digress. Here is your birth story...

You were due on March 3, 2010. I was certain that you'd be late--I just had a feeling--but I didn't anticipate you'd be eight days late! The weather was mild for March. There was no snow on the ground, which is very different from now, your first birthday when there's about three feet of snow on the ground--no joke! I did A LOT of walking and a lot of working. I was supposed to start my leave on March 8th, but I just couldn't do it. I wanted to stay busy since I was going crazy waiting for you. So, I worked until. I just couldn't work anymore, and I schedule my last day to be Wednesday, March 10th. I worked a half day that day, and after I left school, I went right to the doctors office so they could check to see how you were doing!

The appointment took a long time. They wanted to hook me up to a monitor to check your heartbeat and to see if I was having contractions. The equipment wasn't very cooperative, so I was there for 2-1/2 hours. I didn't mind. It felt good just to relax and think about what kind of boy you'd be. I knew you were a boy at about 20 weeks...I like to get the surprise early when it comes to babies. No waiting until birth for me! I started to feel crampy at the office. I mentioned it and they said that it could be practice contractions but since I wasn't very dilated, that it probably didn't mean anything. I scheduled an induction date just in case you didn't decide to make your appearance naturally. If we had gone with the induction date, you would have been born on March 16th. I am so glad I didn't have to wait that long.

As I drove home from the appointment, I started to feel some pains. Nothing major, but enough for me to notice. When I got home I told Daddy and we started to monitor things. I spent some quality time with Will on the couch while Daddy made dinner. After Will went to bed at 7:00, I really started to feel some movement and contractions, so I started to time them. Daddy called Laura, your wonderful daycare provider, to come get Will for the night. We weren't sure you were going to arrive, but we wanted to be prepared and make sure that Will was happy and safe. Laura came and got Will around 8:30, and around 9:30 or 10:00 p.m., Daddy called my doctor's office to tell them what was going on.They said that I should come up to the hospital to check my progress.

We had to go through the emergency entrance since it was about 11:00 when we got there, and the main entrance was closed. I thought it was silly that they made me ride in a wheelchair, since I was convinced we would just be sent right home after I was checked. But I let them wheel me up to the maternity floor and got settled into our excellent corner room. I changed into a coordinating pajama set and the doctors and nurses laughed that I was even thinking about clothing. I wanted to feel good! When they checked me, I was already dilated to 8 centimeters, which shocked me! I was in some pain, but not NEARLY as much as I was in when I had Will. So, I made the decision to do it "au naturel"--without any pain medication. At midnight, the doctor declared that she'd be very surprised if I didn't have a brand new baby boy in my arms by 2:00 a.m.

It was a long night and--I can't lie--a VERY painful night. Pain like I never could imagine and really still can't. It's true that you forget the pain of labor afterward--not that you'll ever experience that! :-) You got a little comfy in there (not really) and I was stuck at 9-1/2 centimeters for HOURS! I was ready to give up on many occasions in the wee hours of that morning and asked for an epidural or a c-section more than once. My "team" cheered me on relentlessly, though, with your dad being the most amazing cheerleader of all. By the time 5:30 rolled around and it was time to push, I was exhausted. My exhaustion meant it took about two hours to push you out.

When you finally emerged into this world at 7:33 a.m. on March 11th, 2010, you were beautifully pink and had a hearty cry. You were chunky legged, chubby cheeked, and absolutely gorgeous. They declared you 9 pounds, 4 ounces and 21.5 inches long. We later realized the scale was broken and estimate your birth weight at about 8 pounds. No matter--you were happy, healthy, and ready to be with us! I was afraid that holding you wouldn't feel as momentous as it did when I held Will for the first time...the second time around and all. I need not have worried--I was moved just as much seeing/holding you for the first time as I was with Will. What I liked better this time is that I was only groggy from being up all night--not from any pain medications. I was a sweaty, tired mess, but I was fully aware of my new baby boy. And you were beautiful. Unforgettable. Snuggly. Blue eyed. Calm.

This is all I'm going to write for tonight, my sweet Patrick James. You have awoken from your slumber, perhaps sensing on some level that Mommy and Daddy are thinking about you right now. You're demanding some snuggles....well, at least a bottle.

I have more thoughts to share with you tomorrow, on your birthday. Until then, I love you to the moon and back and beyond.

XOXOXOXO

Love,
Mommy